We often think our fate is shaped by our goals, grit, or even our to-do list. But more often, it’s shaped by something far more immediate—our nervous system state.
I use a simple model to explain this: the traffic light.
- 🔴 Red = shut down—numb, overwhelmed, checked out.
- 🟡 Yellow = stress mode—tense, reactive, impatient.
- 🟢 Green = steady, grounded, calm, clear, connected.
And here’s the key:
Your state shapes your story. It filters what you notice, how you interpret things, and what options you think are available.
In Green, you have access to your full wisdom—compassion, curiosity, creativity.
In Yellow, your world gets narrow. You feel rushed, triggered, and convinced that something (or someone) is the problem.
In Red, you shut down. You say, “I don’t care,” even when you do.
Most people try to fix their lives from Yellow or Red—pushing harder, making impulsive choices, or walking away when they really needed rest or reconnection.
But you don’t need to change your whole life.
You just need to get back to Green.
Because your state determines your fate. Not in a mystical sense—but because everything you choose is filtered through the state you’re in.
So here’s your check-in for today: What state are you in right now—Green, Yellow, or Red?
If it’s not Green, don’t force a decision. Don’t have the hard conversation. Don’t write the resignation letter.
Instead, take one step toward steady. Breathe. Move. Laugh. Connect. Get yourself back into Green—and then move forward.
That’s how you change your fate—one state at a time.